I’m realizing most of my anxiety stems from worry about how other people may perceive me.

It seems so silly to realize it, but it’s very true for me right now.

If I’m stressed out about things it usually boils down to “they will think this of me if I do this, or that of me if I do that”.

Even more than the actual stressful thing that’s going on.

Realistically, whatever anyone else thinks of me reflects more on them than it does on me.

Not in a good or bad way even.

It just does.

It tells the story of where they’ve been in their life, and how they perceive and interpret the things they see and experience.

It has very little to actually do with me.

If that’s the case, then who cares what anyone else thinks? It has no impact on who I truly am if you think I’m this, or that.

I am me, regardless.

I’m me

and I’m learning what that means more and more every day.

Be you. Learn you. Grow YOU.

Be proud of yourself for it too, wherever you are in your life right now. Be proud of you.

I’m proud of you!

and I’m proud of me too!

💖✨

We all live in a different version of reality.

Every single one of us.

We shape it every moment with the things and the people we surround ourselves with. With the things we allow ourselves to absorb physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually.

We stand and staunchly defend our reality as truth, when truly it is so circumstantial.

You are the only one who has had every single one of your experiences.

You are the only one who chooses what to focus your energy on.

The one who chooses how to interpret the information you’re given. The one who decides how it is then regurgitated into the world.

You form the very fabric of your reality every moment.

What will you focus on today?

Whatever it is, be you, always.

Just remember that not everyone will see the world the same, and that’s okay.

Find you.

(Or don’t. Like I said, it’s entirely up to you. 😂💖)

💖✨

I like to think of myself as an honest person. I’m terrible at lying, and really just prefer to tell the truth. Lies cause more stress than they’re worth to me.

That’s how I think of myself, and describe myself frequently.

It’s only a partial truth though.

Digging a little deeper into myself I can see that when asked a direct question I will either evade it, tell you the truth, or give you a deadpan sarcastic answer.

Sometimes my sarcasm is so deadpan, no one knows if I’m actually telling the truth.

Digging even deeper than that, I realize I actually can lie successfully if I’ve had time to rehearse it.

Now, I don’t typically do that sort of thing. The very thought of doing that makes me recoil a bit, but the point I’m trying to make is that the full truth usually ends up going so much deeper than the initial surface statements imply.

Which is probably true for everybody.

I’ve been realizing lately that we tell our truths as we understand them in that moment.

Which is okay.

There’s nothing we can do differently without first gaining a better understanding of ourselves, and I personally do keep a lot hidden underneath the surface.

I am constantly reflecting, and growing, and evolving.

We all are.

Or we all should be.

There’s just so much there the deeper you dig.

Why bother self-reflecting so deeply?

You’ll have to discover an answer to that for yourself, really.

For me though, I bother because knowing myself more deeply brings me closer to where I want to be in my life. I better understand what I want, and why, and can make decisions accordingly.

I bother because it helps me look back at things I regret in the past, and say “it’s okay”. It allows me to extend the understanding and forgiveness I need to be able to move past it, and grow from it. To understand that my past mistakes do not define me in this moment. To understand that I am human, and flawed, and always learning, and that that’s okay.

I bother because a better understanding of myself gives me a better understanding of the people around me. When I recognize that how other people respond to, and interact with me has so much to do with how they are, and so very little to do with how I am, it becomes easier to exist. To be myself as I am in each moment without worrying about someone else’s reactions to it.

All of these realizations free me to follow the path to my own happiness.

Which I can see more and more clearly every time I gain a deeper understanding of myself.

All of these realizations make it easier to love,

and we could really use a lot more love in this world.

They say if you want to change the world change yourself first, and the world around you will follow suit.

So this is how I’m choosing to live right now.

Dig deeper.

Learn more about yourself.

Then, find your path, and follow it.

It doesn’t have to look like mine or anyone else’s, but whatever it is I hope it brings you joy.

and if it doesn’t you’re always allowed to pick a different one.

💕✨

Stop limiting yourself.

The ocean doesn’t berate itself for not fitting inside a bottle,

the rainforest doesn’t live inside a flower pot,

the sun never tries to dull its shine.

You shouldn’t either.

If society’s expectations suffocate you, if you feel trapped in a box that’s too small,

get out and breathe.

Who are they to tell you who you are, and who you should be?

If their life map doesn’t work for you, flip the whole damn table over and draw your own.

What are they going to do from their tiny little boxes anyway?

That’s all just noise.

Be free.

Be YOU.

Whatever that means for you.

It’s scary, I know, but it’s so very worth it.

🦅🦋✨

(and if you can’t right now, that’s okay too. You are still worthy, and still loved.)

Change.

Change can tear through our lives sometimes like a tornado.

Destroying everything in its path, and leaving us broken into a million tiny pieces.

How do we survive that?

How do we pick back up and move forward again after we’ve shattered?

The truth is you will never put those pieces back together the way they were before.

but that’s okay.

Being broken into so many pieces hurts terribly.

You end up going through your own inner darkness, and sometimes it feels like you won’t get back out of it. It feels overwhelming, and all encompassing.

but you will heal.

Pick each piece of yourself up one by one and examine it.

Hold it up to the light, and learn it. Acknowledge it. Feel it.

Accept it.

Once you can really see it clearly, you’ll know what to do with it.

You will know if it’s something you want to put back into yourself, or something that should be discarded.

Little by little, piece by piece, you do this,

and before you know it you’ve built yourself back into something so beautiful you won’t even recognize the old you.

A stained glass window can hardly be compared to the pieces of glass it started as.

You’ll be able to look at yourself and feel true love for what you see there,

because now you see YOU.

So who are you going to build yourself into?

The possibilities are limitless.

🌪✨🦋

I’ve been talking a lot about happiness this week, but today I was thinking about how sometimes we really just can’t find it in ourselves to be happy.

No matter what we try, or do, we just keep feeling that deep heavy sadness.

That’s okay.

Nothing is wrong with you.

You are allowed to feel it.

Sometimes the best thing we can do for ourselves is to let ourselves feel it.

Give yourself permission to let it out.

Cry. Scream. Shake your fists at the sky. Let the tears roll down your face, and sob if you need to.

Forcing ourselves to put on a happy face when we are miserable helps sometimes. Other times it’s really the worst thing you can do.

Sometimes we need that release.

The sadness, or grief, or pain wells up, and instead of pushing it down sometimes we just really need to feel it.

It’s okay to not be okay.

It’s okay to cry.

It’s okay to allow that hurt to come to the surface.

Sometimes that’s exactly what we need to do.

Sometimes afterwards we can see the sun shining just a little bit brighter again.

Sometimes we still need to cry,

and that’s okay.

💖💞

Sending love your way. Always.

What’s something that you do that makes you fall in love with yourself every time you do it?

I’ll go first.

I like to turn the volume up on my music and dance. Now, I don’t mean dance as in well disciplined, beautiful dancing.

I mean I pretty much just fling my body all around the room to the beat of the music. If anyone actually saw me they would think I had lost my mind.

Which is pretty much the point.

When I feel the music and just move without thought or care, my mind shuts up. It’s just stops. Inevitably I come back to myself, realize how crazy I probably look, and just start to laugh. (Some days I cry too.)

I mean, why not really lock in the mad woman vibe, right? 😂

There’s just this pure joy that bubbles up at how ridiculous I’m being, and how much fun I’m having being ridiculous.

That’s just one example though.

What do you do that makes you feel similarly? Have you found it?

(If you haven’t tried dancing like crazy yet, 10/10 I highly recommend.)

If you do have something that makes your heart sing, do it!

Do it when you feel shitty.

Do it when you feel happy.

Do it whenever your energy feels low.

Just do it more often because honestly, why not?

If something makes you happy, what’s stopping you?

Why is that stopping you?

(It’s okay if you don’t know.)

It’s really nice though, to allow yourself to stop thinking about all the things you should be doing, and just let yourself feel alive again. Even if only for a few minutes.

Remind yourself what it feels like to experience pure joy again,

because you deserve it.

You really do.

If you still can’t bring yourself to do whatever it is though, that’s okay.

Just remember you deserve it.

You are worth it.

You are loved.

💖✨

I wrote this in May of 2019, and just stumbled upon it in my drafts again. It was a nice reminder that we’re all connected, even when we’re apart. I hope it brings you a little bit of light.

✨✨✨

Does a connection with somebody ever really die?

I was thinking again this morning how every single person who’s touched our lives in some way or another is connected to us.

I mean, you may not speak to one another, you may not even be friends online, but at one point in time they made enough of an impression on your life to remain in your memory.

It’s fascinating.

Of course, I do think that some connections fade. They die, or are severed.

Some you don’t want to be connected to at all.

The good ones though. Those connections, those memories, are the ones that shine.

I think of all the random people we encounter and nod to, smile at, wave to.

Hell, even the people we pretend we don’t see so we can walk by without interacting.

It’s as if there are these thin little strands of light connecting everyone, even if only briefly.

I think of my family and friends. All the people I’ve ever cared about.

When I think of all of my memories with each of them, it’s as if the entire world lights up like a million brilliant lightbulbs.

These massive strands of light connecting me to them.

Even when we’re terrible at keeping in touch, even when we’re far apart, or nearby but feeling far.

So many connections.

So much light.

I think I’ll try to remember that next time the world feels dark.

Remind myself of all the light that’s radiating out from each of us, reaching towards one another, connecting.

So anyway, here’s me, sending this thin strand of light out towards you today too. Just in case you need it.

❤️✨